Since 2014, I’ve wanted to move out of Manila. I dreamt of relocation and fantasized about starting a new adventure. When I was applying for a role overseas, an interviewer asked me what animal I would be and why. While I thought the question was odd, I was pleased with myself for responding immediately and being quick on my feet. I said, “A bird so that I can see the world and navigate it without borders.” Simple enough, right? Well, Nelly Furtado never painted it otherwise.
Four months have passed since I moved to Singapore. Not only have I been stuck to my work desk. I’ve been unable to write and I’m close to abandoning my passion project – One Man Anthem.
I won’t lie. Part of me regrets the decision to move. But LunchMoney Lewis puts it best – “I’ve got bills I gotta pay. So I’m gon’ work work work every day”.
Nowadays, time has not been on my side. But when has it ever been? I stay up late, work crazy hours and barely get any sleep. Whatever excess time I can get, I channel it to sleep, relaxation and getting a drink with my constants. But where does music fit into the picture?
Flashback to three years ago, I concluded there were only four important things in my life – (1) family and friends (2) career (3) music and (4) travel. The rest are noise and distractions I can do away with. Screw fitness, romance and my unhealthy addiction to television and film. But here I am today unable to prioritize and I frequently get things mixed up.
Now, is time and my capability to prioritize the culprit? Maybe not. I still enjoy listening to music. In fact, for close to a month now, it has allowed me to “walk fast” as an exercise. Music has been the perfect companion to push my otherwise lazy ass out of the couch and into the street.
I’ve given it some thought. Should that passion translate to a website where I communicate my views to a wider audience? What do I get from it? Do I simply want validation? Partly yes but that’s not it.
It boils down to one simple truth –
I prefer a career in writing and sharing my thoughts about music. Don’t get me wrong. My job is amazing and I have a career that I can be proud of. But that smile can be bigger and the consistency of that satisfaction can be improved.
However, from where I stand, it’s neither practical nor logical to take that leap today. If I continue on this journey and work harder, maybe one day it will be.
What I can conclude is that One Man Anthem is here to stay. I may not take it to the heights I envisioned when I first bought that domain name. But I’m going to fucking fight for it.